Night thoughts.

I'm currently lying in bed between my snoring husband & our not quite sleeping but drowsy nursing baby. Our determinedly sleep resisting baby. 

I feel like I've spent the last four hours trying to get Iris to sleep. 

Look how sleepy she is. 

I think I have. I have had almost no me time today. One of those days where Owen came home from work & Iris immediately began needing me & only me & so the evening went. 

I struggle in my heart at these times, because she's so wonderful & just when I'm getting the most annoyed at being stuck lying next to her in bed endlessly nursing, she's just so sweet & it's amazing really that she wants & needs me like this. 

It's wonderful, it's the most amazing thing I've ever done. Still sometimes I struggle with the patience to resist my desire to just go into the kitchen & drink some wine & listen to music & cook dinner the way I used to. 

Sigh. It was again one of those nights. Still trying out the early bedtime, so it was  just a long cycle of nurse for an hour, sleep for 20 minutes, wake up & scream, repeat. I wish her dad could console her, but he really can't. 

We had an excellent day until evening. Fun boob group, successful downtown trip to buy stamps at the post office, & duck pants & striped overalls for Iris at the Salvation Army,  & an overpriced hot chocolate at Greenfield Coffee for me. And a nice walk with the hound at home after. It was in the high 40s today, not bad for Western Mass in December. We got out of the house, we accomplished things, we hung out with cool mamas.

But I had high productivity hopes for the evening that sure didn't pan out. 

The positives: I took a lovely shower during Iris' first short nap. I started to cook dinner during her second. 

During the nursing her to sleep stretches I've been rereading "The Time Traveler's Wife", which is one of my very favorite books & why Iris was almost named Clare ( don't tell). 

I find it's difficult for me to read when I'm also tending to Iris, but I can reread my favorite books, they are like old friends. So rereading Time Traveler's Wife for the hundredth time is nice. 

I did make dinner, I made a turkey & Brussel sprouts curry from the endless pile of Thanksgiving leftovers, served over wild rice blend made with turkey stock & sour cream & sriracha.

Owen just ate leftover pizza from last nights' creative use of Thanksgiving leftovers,

but despite the baby related time constraints, I actually felt like cooking. I needed to. 

(Isn't this still a food blog?)

So by reading & cooking I got to feel like myself a tiny bit, I guess that's the moral of this story? 

And my sweet girl is now asleep & my husband is snoring loudly in my ear. 

Now Owen is talking in his sleep about beer prices. Iris seems totally out, except most likely not if I leave the bed. I am of course totally wide awake.

Hello world. 

Thanksgiving, For Better Or Worse.

The Turkey, Jackson, NH, November 2010. 

Everything seems like a lot right now, but Thanksgiving did still happen.
One more drawing from last year. Blah blah blah holidays are very weird when you recently lose someone.
Not sure what I can personally handle for Christmas this year, but I feel good about decorating, I think. I guess you just do what feels right in these moments, i.e. I want to hang lights all over the house & have a giant tree & cover everything in glitter & but I honestly can't see opening presents without Gramma. 
Doesn't make sense, I know. But all the decorating crap seems peaceful, but I kind of want to skip out on the actual day this year.

Getting In The Thanksgiving Spirit, aka Cranberry Sauce & Stuffing & Gravy.

Well, it will be Thanksgiving the day after tomorrow. After some (hopefully brief) hours in Grocery Hell, I get to pack up my husband & my dog in the car (sorry DustyRose but you are not a good traveler), & drive to Cape Cod to see my family & eat good things.

 Thanksgiving 2010: The Sides, Part Two.

The (homemade by mum, always) cranberry sauce, the stuffing, & the garlicky green beans.

I lied. These sides are important too.

Anyway, I whine & moan a lot, but I'm grateful. Very very grateful, & looking forward to home tomorrow. Happy Thanksgiving almost.

Thanksgivings Past & Future.

Apparently I am about a year behind in current events on this blog, as I never finished my drawings from last Thanksgiving.
Well, never say never-I just finished one. I drew this last November, in Jackson, NH, the same house where we spent our honeymoon. 

Thanksgiving 2010: The Sides, Part One. 

aka the MOST important Thanksgiving sides, mashed potatoes & creamed onions. More important than turkey or stuffing (although stuffing is pretty damn important).

Last year was an atypical Thanksgiving, in that Owen & I joined my moms in New Hampshire in a borrowed house in a beautiful place. 

This year is different in that we Diamonds lost a terribly important family member in September & one week later Owen & got married. 

It's a rather emotional holiday, I think for all of us. I can barely even write this, really, so no details. 

This year Thanksgiving will be at home, in Brewster, on Cape Cod, with new family but with a huge absence, too. 

All I meant to say here was, cheers to Thanksgiving (the sacred holiday of EnD), & all it brings.

& Gramma, I'm missing you a lot, everyday, even if I'm not so good at talking about it. But neither were you, really.

Above All, We Celebrate Cooking. Thanksgiving Part Four.

That's what Thanksgiving means to me, the holiday of no other obligation than sharing a meal with people you love. It's the signature holiday of EnD. The day after Thanksgiving, DR was mad that I wasn't cooking. It was a pretty insane day for me, that day after Thanksgiving. I woke up surrounded by pans of turkey & stuffing & brussel sprouts. My beloved car died, & I spent six hours in the emergency room.

(mom cook something)

Returning home around 9pm, I ate french fries with mayonnaise & sriracha (these Alexia frozen ones because despite many facebook requests no one would bring me a bacon cheeseburger & onion rings) (& set the oven on fire) & shared a magnum of the Anchor Steam Christmas Ale, & then went dancing at the WWII with my favorite person. Pretty appropriate for the day after, I think, but don't worry, I cooked my ass off the following week.

Thus ends the 2009 Thanksgiving Live-Blogging (sort-of) Experiment.

What's gonna happen on Christmas?!

Here's Where We Get Back To The Gravy. Thanksgiving Part Three.

Um, Yeah, the 2009 Eating & Drawing Thanksgiving Live-Blogging Experiment kinda fell apart around the time that it started to seem like a really good idea to actually EAT Thanksgiving Dinner, rather than draw it & starve. Don't worry though, y'all, eat thanksgiving dinner I most certainly did & I drew it too.

Sides (other than stuffing): my favorite sides for most meat courses

(extremely delicious with steak)

buttery mashed potatoes & brussel sprouts roasted with garlic.

& finally, FINALLY, food plated:

rosemary & sage turkey breast, gravy, yukon gold mashed potatoes, apple-pinenut stuffing, roasted brussel sprouts with garlic.

Yup, I like gravy. I do think the Shawmut Diner's was was more satisfying. But this was my first complete Thanksgiving dinner, & I don't think it turned out half-bad.

The leftovers were better, Sunday night, over a glitter n' glow puzzle.

Thanksgiving dessert also didn't happen the night of Thanksgiving, but it happened, via David Lebovitz and Chez Panisse. Yeah yeah yeah I drew it. What was it? SUSPENSE.

Obviously, There Is Stuffing. Thanksgiving Part Two.

Still Semi-Live Blogging this meal. So....Stuffing, in my opinion the MOST IMPORTANT element of THANKSGIVING. When else do you really eat stuffing? Come on.

(Disclaimer: I really want all my stuffing to include sausage & this year I wanted it to be Oyster & Sausage, but the other theme of this year is "zero money = use what you have").

Which leads to shallots, some local heirloom apples, garlic, & pine-nuts simmered in a pan of butter & olive oil...

...which leads to my newly invented (aka tonight): Apple-Pinenut Stuffing.

Placed in the oven next to the turkey with more butter on top.

Currently I'm working on the mashed potatoes & brussel sprouts. Seriously. I may never actually eat. & when am I going to find time for PIE? I ask you.

So It Begins. Thanksgiving Part One.

In which the turkey breast goes into the oven. & during its first hour in the oven, I've done this. Live Blogging Thanksgiving, only here on EnD.

Stuffed with rosemary & sage (brought home fresh from Mum's garden, Brewster, Cape Cod, & dried by me in my kitchen) & drenched in butter, olive oil & salt & pepper.

DR was offered a can of turkey wellness formula, & promptly turned that shit down. (good kitty).

You cannot believe how good my kitchen smells right now. Off to make the stuffing. See you soon, right here, with stuffing drawings.